blue window
It's a friday midnight, 1.50am to be exact. I can't sleep, I'm in partial insomnia after taking some prescribed medications from SG healthway clinic.
Dredging to work this saturday once again, i hate it when my boss is taking advantage of what i am capable of and subtle-ly forced me to work extra hours.
Life indeed has changed so much for me lately. It's been like what, 5 months of me dissapearing from this blog, from kuching, from the life i used to live in? I'm still thinking of how i come about the idea to work in Singapore in the first place. It was one of the toughest decision which i've to make in my life. My music, bandmates, tons of friends, my family, my entire life is in fact based here in Kuching. Why should i break the circle of my own comfort zone? The catch about Singapore is nothing greater than for the sole purpose of building my career, the reason is because every tom, dick and harry's future lies in a better looking portfolio. For me to get a foundation in IT by working my way up in Kuching would be like peanuts to ants. It's better for me to get ahead in Singapore and work my ass off while i still can instead here in the big city.
I agreed it was quite selfish of me to get ahead all by myself and leave my dear beloved hometown just like that, it was so sudden as i didnt even had the chance to say goodbye to most of the people that i loved the most in my life. The worst blow was my dad who just got to know in a haste when he saw me packing up my things into a bag to fly to Singapore that night itself. I cried in the airport upon leaving as i began deleting all the goodbye smses. All these thoughts keeps on ringing in my head every now and then. Shit, i'm emo..
I began to ponder about my life here in Singapore everyday as i sit alone smoking my life away to a cup of latte in the cafe after work. Maybe its time for me to sit and think hard about what i want to do in my life from here on. A rockstar dream, somehow after all that has happened i'm still bent of achieving what i came here to do. I suppose i was contended with my life here lately, until something urgent happened.
Oddly around 5am on a saturday i received a call from my cousin who just came over to visit me in Singapore before going to kl for his studies, i thought something must have happened to him in KL. I was shocked when i picked up the call and was dazed to find that his dad, our beloved uncle has just passed away around 2am that morning. I had to work that saturday morning, so after work my aunt from Singapore drove me, my uncle and his grandmother as we took a flight home to attend the funeral. I manage to apply for emergency leave this time and there in Kuching we were all sadden by the event.
I won't reveal further details of the funeral, however all i could stress is that the death of my uncle has a larger impact on everyone than it seems to have. I could only tell you that his death marked a history in my life as well as all those who knew him. We were all reduced to tears in disbeleive of what happened...
All these events shows me a sign, maybe its time for me to go home? Who knows, we'll just wait and see what happens next... Good night for now
Dredging to work this saturday once again, i hate it when my boss is taking advantage of what i am capable of and subtle-ly forced me to work extra hours.
Life indeed has changed so much for me lately. It's been like what, 5 months of me dissapearing from this blog, from kuching, from the life i used to live in? I'm still thinking of how i come about the idea to work in Singapore in the first place. It was one of the toughest decision which i've to make in my life. My music, bandmates, tons of friends, my family, my entire life is in fact based here in Kuching. Why should i break the circle of my own comfort zone? The catch about Singapore is nothing greater than for the sole purpose of building my career, the reason is because every tom, dick and harry's future lies in a better looking portfolio. For me to get a foundation in IT by working my way up in Kuching would be like peanuts to ants. It's better for me to get ahead in Singapore and work my ass off while i still can instead here in the big city.
I agreed it was quite selfish of me to get ahead all by myself and leave my dear beloved hometown just like that, it was so sudden as i didnt even had the chance to say goodbye to most of the people that i loved the most in my life. The worst blow was my dad who just got to know in a haste when he saw me packing up my things into a bag to fly to Singapore that night itself. I cried in the airport upon leaving as i began deleting all the goodbye smses. All these thoughts keeps on ringing in my head every now and then. Shit, i'm emo..
I began to ponder about my life here in Singapore everyday as i sit alone smoking my life away to a cup of latte in the cafe after work. Maybe its time for me to sit and think hard about what i want to do in my life from here on. A rockstar dream, somehow after all that has happened i'm still bent of achieving what i came here to do. I suppose i was contended with my life here lately, until something urgent happened.
Oddly around 5am on a saturday i received a call from my cousin who just came over to visit me in Singapore before going to kl for his studies, i thought something must have happened to him in KL. I was shocked when i picked up the call and was dazed to find that his dad, our beloved uncle has just passed away around 2am that morning. I had to work that saturday morning, so after work my aunt from Singapore drove me, my uncle and his grandmother as we took a flight home to attend the funeral. I manage to apply for emergency leave this time and there in Kuching we were all sadden by the event.
I won't reveal further details of the funeral, however all i could stress is that the death of my uncle has a larger impact on everyone than it seems to have. I could only tell you that his death marked a history in my life as well as all those who knew him. We were all reduced to tears in disbeleive of what happened...
All these events shows me a sign, maybe its time for me to go home? Who knows, we'll just wait and see what happens next... Good night for now
posted by joseph han at 9:50 AM
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